A Guide to not becoming Demotivated by Motivational Posts

Have you ever been guilty of practising or preaching Toxic Positivity? I have, to both. There is nothing wrong with being positive, but the positivity we try to put on ourselves or require from others should be reasonable and within context. Same when we encounter posts that are overly positive. We need to reason with them and look at their relativity within the context of our personal lives before trying to follow or adapt the teaching. Ever so often, I reread my posts and I know that I am guilty of being too positive. The message is there but it’s not always comprehensive. It was and is never my intention to be positive in a toxic way. I was just writing words that I needed to hear and sharing it for the persons that could also benefit from it. Would it be good or helpful to everyone? No. Motivational and Inspirational quotes/words/sayings are never universal. They are only specific to the persons who need to hear it at the time they need to hear it.

You don’t really expect anything less or more from motivational quotes or posts; they’re meant to motivate. When you see a post that says “you just need to wake up and decide what you want”, it’s meant to motivate a person out of a rut, but it isn’t meant to consider all the fine details of a person’s life. As a person who writes motivational quotes and pieces, I can say that motivational posts are superficial. They aren’t often sensitive to mental health issues, racial and gender divisions or financial restrictions. They act as the key to start the ignition – not considering the internal workings of the vehicle or the journey ahead.

There was a lot of confusion around a post that circled at the beginning of quarantine which said that if you don’t get anything done during this [quarantine] time, then you never lacked time, you lacked discipline. A lot of people condemned this post because it promoted toxic positivity and ignored little details like some people might be suffering from anxiety and different issues that might affect their ability to produce or create during this time. To me, I felt the post applicable because I had just left my job due to contract changes and was struggling to get another one. I had went from feeling my life was on track to feeling like everyone was moving forward and I had fallen off the rails. For me, this quarantine period put a pause on everyone’s life and my silver lining was I could use this time to play catch up. I saw this post and thought yes! I have time now, and not only that but time has been forced to stand still (figuratively, that is). I could focus 100% on my writing without losing my head sending out job applications and calling around. I could use this time to work on my dancing and practice the keyboard and violin; things that I didn’t always have time to do. Most importantly, I could not be consumed with frustrations and feelings of self-doubt every single day that passes and I don’t get a call for a job interview. For me, that post applied.

However, for the person who lives paycheck to paycheck, the quarantine might not have presented an environment where they felt ease to pick up a new hobby or skill. For the person living in a broken or abusive home, it wouldn’t be easy to be stuck at home for that long period of time. For children, like my nephew, who were excited to graduate and spend their last few months with their friends before going their separate ways, they might have feelings of withdrawal, separation and disappointment that makes them stay on their phones and computers whole day, maintaining communication as best as possible, with no desire to do anything else.

Motivational Pieces are good and some days, they are exactly what you need, but their applicability depends on you. The key doesn’t work if the engine is shot, neither does it have any power or influence on whether the roads before you will have potholes or speed-bumps or dead-ends. It’s important to remember this when you’re following these motivational words or looking to them for inspiration. They are not gospel. Use them as pick-me-ups on a day when you’re feeling lethargic or when you need help keeping the momentum going. Do not use them as measuring sticks to assess your internal drive on days when you are overwhelmed or burdened with different obstacles and interruptions that do not make progression easy. They are not evil words but they can be harmful if you don’t keep these little pieces of information in the back of your mind when reading them.